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https://preview.redd.it/izapwkrcdd661.jpg?width=300&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5954285d6770a98c335d04f93a365dd42d555b51
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Which Director had the best run in the 60s?

Best run in terms of anything
Stanley Kubrick: Lolita, 2001: A Space Odyssey, Spartacus, and Dr. Strangelove.
Robert Wise: The Sound of Music, West Side Story, The Sand Pebbles, The Haunting, Two for the Seesaw, and Star!.
Jean Luc Godard: Breathless, Contempt, My Life to Live, Two or Three Things I Know About Her, Pierrot le Fou, Bande à part, A Woman Is a Woman, Le petit soldat, The Carabineers, A Married Woman, Alphaville, Made in U.S.A, Masculin Féminin, La Chinoise, Weekend, One Plus One, Joy of Learning, A Film Like Any Other, and British Sounds.
David Lean: Lawrence of Arabia and Doctor Zhivago
Francois Truffaut: Stolen Kisses, Antoine and Colette, Shoot the Piano Player, Jules and Jim, The Soft Skin, Fahrenheit 451, The Bride Wore Black, and Mississippi Mermaid.
Alfred Hitchcock: Psycho, The Birds, Topaz, Marnie, and Torn Curtain.
Billy Wilder: The Apartment, Irma la Douce, The Fortune Cookie, One, Two, Three, and Kiss Me, Stupid.
Federico Fellini: 8 1/2, La Dolce Vita, Juliet of the Spirits, Satyricon, Spirits of the Dead, and Boccaccio '70.
Ingmar Bergman: Persona, Shame, Hour of the Wolf, The Passion of Anna, The Rite, All These Women, The Silence, Through a Glass Darkly, Winter Light, The Devil's Eye, and The Virgin Spring.
Mike Nichols: The Graduate Teach me!, and Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?.
Sidney Lumet: The Fugitive Kind, The Appointment, The Hill, The Deadly Affair, Fail Safe, Bye Bye Braverman, The Group, A View from the Bridge, The Pawnbroker, and Long Day's Journey into Night.
Luchino Visconti: Rocco and His Brothers, The Damned, The Leopard, Sandra, and The Stranger.
George Roy Hill: Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, Thoroughly Modern Millie, Hawaii, The World of Henry Orient, Period of Adjustment, and Toys in the Attic .
Roman Polanski: Knife in the Water, Repulsion, Rosemary's Baby, The World's Most Beautiful Swindlers, and Cul-de-sac.
John Huston: The Unforgiven, The Misfits, The Night of the Iguana, The List of Adrian Messenger, The Bible: In the Beginning..., Freud, Reflections in a Golden Eye, A Walk with Love and Death, Casino Royale, and Sinful Davey.
Sergio Leone: The Dollars Trilogy, Once Upon a Time in the West, and The Colossus of Rhodes.
Michelangelo Antonioni: Blowup, L'Avventura, L'Eclisse, La Notte, and Red Desert.
John Ford: How the West Was Won, The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance, Sergeant Rutledge, 7 Women, Cheyenne Autumn, Two Rode Together, and Donovan's Reef.
Akira Kurosawa: Yojimbo, Red Beard, Sanjuro, The Bad Sleep Well, and High and Low.
John Frankenheimer: Birdman of Alcatraz, The Manchurian Candidate, The Train, Seven Days in May, Seconds, Grand Prix, All Fall Down, The Fixer, The Young Savages, The Gypsy Moths, and The Extraordinary Seaman.
Vittorio De Sica: Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow, Woman Times Seven, Marriage Italian Style, After the Fox, Un monde nouveau, Il giudizio universale, The Condemned of Altona, and Two Women.
Blake Edwards: Breakfast at Tiffany's, Days of Wine and Roses, The Party, The Great Race, A Shot in the Dark, High Time, Soldier in the Rain, Experiment in Terror, and The Pink Panther.
John Sturges: The Great Escape, The Magnificent Seven, Ice Station Zebra, Marooned, Hour of the Gun, A Girl Named Tamiko, By Love Possessed, and Sergeants 3.
Stanley Kramer: Guess Who's Coming to Dinner, It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World, Ship of Fools, Inherit the Wind, Judgment at Nuremberg, and The Secret of Santa Vittoria.
Robert Aldrich: What Ever Happened to Baby Jane?, Hush...Hush, Sweet Charlotte, The Flight of the Phoenix, The Dirty Dozen, The Killing of Sister George, The Last Sunset, 4 for Texas, and Sodom and Gomorrah.
Mario Bava: The Girl Who Knew Too Much, Black Sunday, Kill, Baby, Kill, Hercules in the Haunted World, Knives of the, Erik the Conqueror Avenger, Danger: Diabolik, Black Sabbath, Blood and Black Lace, and Planet of the Vampires.
Elia Kazan: Wild River, The Arrangement, America America, and Splendor in the Grass.
Samuel Fuller: Shock Corridor, The Naked Kiss, Shark!, Underworld U.S.A., and Merrill's Marauders.
Robert Bresson: Au hasard Balthazar, Mouchette, The Trial of Joan of Arc, and A Gentle Woman.
Andrei Tarkovsky: Andrei Rublev and Ivan's Childhood.
Sam Peckinpah: The Wild Bunch, Major Dundee, The Deadly Companions, and Ride the High Country.
Yasujirō Ozu: Late Autumn, The End of Summer, and An Autumn Afternoon.
Robert Altman: Countdown and That Cold Day in the Park.
Francis Ford Coppola: Tonight for Sure, The Bellboy and the Playgirls, Dementia 13, You're a Big Boy Now, Finian's Rainbow, and The Rain People.
Jean-Pierre Melville: Léon Morin, Priest, Army of Shadows, Le Samouraï, Magnet of Doom, Le Doulos, and Le deuxième
Luis Buñuel: The Milky Way, Belle de Jour, Simon of the Desert, Diary of a Chambermaid, The Young One, The Exterminating Angel, and Viridiana.
John Cassavetes : Faces, A Child Is Waiting, and Too Late Blues.
Roberto Rossellini: The Taking of Power by Louis XIV, Uno sguardo dal ponte, Escape by Night, Garibaldi, Les Carabiniers, Vanina Vanini, Les Carabiniers, Anima nera, and Benito Mussolini.
Pier Paolo Pasolini: Mamma Roma, The Gospel According to St. Matthew, Accattone, The Hawks and the Sparrows, Pigsty, Theorem, Oedipus Rex, and Medea.
Howard Hawks: Man's Favorite Sport?, Red Line 7000, El Dodrado, and Hatari!.
John Schlesinger: Darling, Midnight Cowboy, Far from the Madding Crowd, A Kind of Loving, and Billy Liar.
Martin Ritt: Hud, Paris Blues, Hemingway's Adventures of a Young Man, The Spy Who Came In from the Cold, The Outrage, Hombre, Five Branded Women, and The Brotherhood.
Jack Clayton: The Innocents, The Pumpkin Eater, and Our Mother's House.
Robert Mulligan: The Rat Race, The Great Impostor, The Spiral Road, To Kill a Mockingbird, Love with the Proper Stranger, Inside Daisy Clover, Baby the Rain Must Fall, Up the Down Staircase, and The Stalking Moon.
Satyajit Ray: Nyak, Two, Teen Kanya, Kanchenjungha, Devi, Rabindranath Tagore, Abhijan, Mahanagar, Aranyer Din Ratri, Chiriyakhana, Goopy Gyne Bagha Byne, Charulata, and Mahapurush.
Tony Richardson: Tom Jones, The Entertainer, A Subject of Scandal and Concern, A Taste of Honey, Sanctuary, Hamlet, Red and Blue, Laughter in the Dark, The Loved One, The Loneliness of the Long Distance Runner, Mademoiselle, The Sailor from Gibraltar, The Charge of the Light Brigade, and Laughter in the Dark.
Bryan Forbes: Séance on a Wet Afternoon,Whistle Down the Wind, King Rat,The L-Shaped Room, Deadfall, The Wrong Box, The Whisperers, and The Madwoman of Chaillot.
Richard Brooks: Elmer Gantry, In Cold Blood, The Happy Ending, Sweet Bird of Youth, Lord Jim, and The Professionals.
Claude Chabrol: Les Biches, The Unfaithful Wife, The Champagne Murders, Les Bonnes Femmes, Wise Guys, The Third Lover, Landru, Ophélia, Le Tigre aime la chair fraiche, Marie-Chantal contre le docteur Kha, Our Agent Tiger, The Road to Corinth, and This Man Must Die.
Mario Monicelli: The Passionate Thief, Casanova 70, Caprice Italian Style, The Girl with the Pistol, Organizer, L'armata Brancaleone, High Infidelity, and Sex Quartet.
Norman Jewison: In the Heat of the Night, The Thomas Crown Affair, The Cincinnati Kid, The Russians Are Coming, the Russians Are Coming, Gaily, Gaily, 40 Pounds of Trouble, The Thrill of It All, Send Me No Flowers, and The Art of Love.
Gillo Pontecorvo: The Battle of Algiers, Burn!, and Paras.
Ken Russell: Song of Summer, French Dressing, Women in Love, and Billion Dollar Brain
Ken Loach: Kes and Poor Cow.
Costa-Gavras:Z, Shock Troops, and The Sleeping Car Murders
Jacques Demy: The Umbrellas of Cherbourg, The Young Girls of Rochefort, Lola, Bay of Angels, and Model Shop.
Carol Reed: Oliver!, The Running Man, and The Agony and the Ecstasy.
Fred Zinnemann: A Man for All Seasons, The Sundowners, and Behold a Pale Horse.
Arthur Penn: The Chase, Alice's Restaurant, Bonnie and Clyde, The Miracle Worker, and Mickey One.
Agnes Varda: Cléo de 5 à 7, Le Bonheur, Lions from love, Les Créatures, and Loin du Vietnam.
Masaki Kobayashi: Harakiri, Samurai Rebellion, The Inheritance, A Soldier's Prayer, Hymn to a Tired Man, and Kwaidan.
Otto Preminger: Advise & Consent, Exodus, The Cardinal, Bunny Lake Is Missing, In Harm's Way, Skidoo, and Hurry Sundown.
Stanley Donen: Charade, Two for the Road, The Grass Is Greener, Surprise Package, and Once More, with Feeling!.
Nicholas Ray: The Savage Innocents, 55 Days at Peking, and King of Kings.
Luis García Berlanga: Long Live the Bride and Groom, Three Fables of Love, The Executioner, Plácido, and La boutique.
Walerian Borowczyk: Mr. and Mrs. Kabal's Theatre, Renaissance, and Goto, Island of Love.
Karel Reisz: Isadora, Saturday Night and Sunday Morning, Night Must Fall, and Morgan – A Suitable Case for Treatment.
Joseph Losey: Eva, The Criminal, The Damned, King and Country, The Servant, Boom!, Accident, Secret Ceremony, and Modesty Blaise.
Mark Robson: Daddy's Gone A-Hunting, Von Ryan's Express, The Prize, Valley of the Dolls, The Inspector, Nine Hours to Rama, Lost Command, and From the Terrace.
Richard Fleischer: Che!, Fantastic Voyage, The Big Gamble, Barabbas, The Boston Strangler, Doctor Dolittle, and Crack in the Mirror,
submitted by Britneyfan456 to flicks [link] [comments]

Which Director had the best run in the 60s

Best run in terms of anything
Stanley Kubrick: Lolita, 2001: A Space Odyssey, Spartacus, and Dr. Strangelove.
Robert Wise: The Sound of Music, West Side Story, The Sand Pebbles, The Haunting, Two for the Seesaw, and Star!.
Jean Luc Godard: Breathless, Contempt, My Life to Live, Two or Three Things I Know About Her, Pierrot le Fou, Bande à part, A Woman Is a Woman, Le petit soldat, The Carabineers, A Married Woman, Alphaville, Made in U.S.A, Masculin Féminin, La Chinoise, Weekend, One Plus One, Joy of Learning, A Film Like Any Other, and British Sounds.
David Lean: Lawrence of Arabia and Doctor Zhivago
Francois Truffaut: Stolen Kisses, Antoine and Colette, Shoot the Piano Player, Jules and Jim, The Soft Skin, Fahrenheit 451, The Bride Wore Black, and Mississippi Mermaid.
Alfred Hitchcock: Psycho, The Birds, Topaz, Marnie, and Torn Curtain.
Billy Wilder: The Apartment, Irma la Douce, The Fortune Cookie, One, Two, Three, and Kiss Me, Stupid.
Federico Fellini: 8 1/2, La Dolce Vita, Juliet of the Spirits, Satyricon, Spirits of the Dead, and Boccaccio '70.
Ingmar Bergman: Persona, Shame, Hour of the Wolf, The Passion of Anna, The Rite, All These Women, The Silence, Through a Glass Darkly, Winter Light, The Devil's Eye, and The Virgin Spring.
Mike Nichols: The Graduate Teach me!, and Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?.
Sidney Lumet: The Fugitive Kind, The Appointment, The Hill, The Deadly Affair, Fail Safe, Bye Bye Braverman, The Group, A View from the Bridge, The Pawnbroker, and Long Day's Journey into Night.
Luchino Visconti: Rocco and His Brothers, The Damned, The Leopard, Sandra, and The Stranger.
George Roy Hill: Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, Thoroughly Modern Millie, Hawaii, The World of Henry Orient, Period of Adjustment, and Toys in the Attic .
Roman Polanski: Knife in the Water, Repulsion, Rosemary's Baby, The World's Most Beautiful Swindlers, and Cul-de-sac.
John Huston: The Unforgiven, The Misfits, The Night of the Iguana, The List of Adrian Messenger, The Bible: In the Beginning..., Freud, Reflections in a Golden Eye, A Walk with Love and Death, Casino Royale, and Sinful Davey.
Sergio Leone: The Dollars Trilogy, Once Upon a Time in the West, and The Colossus of Rhodes.
Michelangelo Antonioni: Blowup, L'Avventura, L'Eclisse, La Notte, and Red Desert.
John Ford: How the West Was Won, The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance, Sergeant Rutledge, 7 Women, Cheyenne Autumn, Two Rode Together, and Donovan's Reef.
Akira Kurosawa: Yojimbo, Red Beard, Sanjuro, The Bad Sleep Well, and High and Low.
John Frankenheimer: Birdman of Alcatraz, The Manchurian Candidate, The Train, Seven Days in May, Seconds, Grand Prix, All Fall Down, The Fixer, The Young Savages, The Gypsy Moths, and The Extraordinary Seaman.
Vittorio De Sica: Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow, Woman Times Seven, Marriage Italian Style, After the Fox, Un monde nouveau, Il giudizio universale, The Condemned of Altona, and Two Women.
Blake Edwards: Breakfast at Tiffany's, Days of Wine and Roses, The Party, The Great Race, A Shot in the Dark, High Time, Soldier in the Rain, Experiment in Terror, and The Pink Panther.
John Sturges: The Great Escape, The Magnificent Seven, Ice Station Zebra, Marooned, Hour of the Gun, A Girl Named Tamiko, By Love Possessed, and Sergeants 3.
Stanley Kramer: Guess Who's Coming to Dinner, It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World, Ship of Fools, Inherit the Wind, Judgment at Nuremberg, and The Secret of Santa Vittoria.
Robert Aldrich: What Ever Happened to Baby Jane?, Hush...Hush, Sweet Charlotte, The Flight of the Phoenix, The Dirty Dozen, The Killing of Sister George, The Last Sunset, 4 for Texas, and Sodom and Gomorrah.
Mario Bava: The Girl Who Knew Too Much, Black Sunday, Kill, Baby, Kill, Hercules in the Haunted World, Knives of the, Erik the Conqueror Avenger, Danger: Diabolik, Black Sabbath, Blood and Black Lace, and Planet of the Vampires.
Elia Kazan: Wild River, The Arrangement, America America, and Splendor in the Grass.
Samuel Fuller: Shock Corridor, The Naked Kiss, Shark!, Underworld U.S.A., and Merrill's Marauders.
Robert Bresson: Au hasard Balthazar, Mouchette, The Trial of Joan of Arc, and A Gentle Woman.
Andrei Tarkovsky: Andrei Rublev and Ivan's Childhood.
Sam Peckinpah: The Wild Bunch, Major Dundee, The Deadly Companions, and Ride the High Country.
Yasujirō Ozu: Late Autumn, The End of Summer, and An Autumn Afternoon.
Robert Altman: Countdown and That Cold Day in the Park.
Francis Ford Coppola: Tonight for Sure, The Bellboy and the Playgirls, Dementia 13, You're a Big Boy Now, Finian's Rainbow, and The Rain People.
Jean-Pierre Melville: Léon Morin, Priest, Army of Shadows, Le Samouraï, Magnet of Doom, Le Doulos, and Le deuxième
Luis Buñuel: The Milky Way, Belle de Jour, Simon of the Desert, Diary of a Chambermaid, The Young One, The Exterminating Angel, and Viridiana.
John Cassavetes : Faces, A Child Is Waiting, and Too Late Blues.
Roberto Rossellini: The Taking of Power by Louis XIV, Uno sguardo dal ponte, Escape by Night, Garibaldi, Les Carabiniers, Vanina Vanini, Les Carabiniers, Anima nera, and Benito Mussolini.
Pier Paolo Pasolini: Mamma Roma, The Gospel According to St. Matthew, Accattone, The Hawks and the Sparrows, Pigsty, Theorem, Oedipus Rex, and Medea.
Howard Hawks: Man's Favorite Sport?, Red Line 7000, El Dodrado, and Hatari!.
John Schlesinger: Darling, Midnight Cowboy, Far from the Madding Crowd, A Kind of Loving, and Billy Liar.
Martin Ritt: Hud, Paris Blues, Hemingway's Adventures of a Young Man, The Spy Who Came In from the Cold, The Outrage, Hombre, Five Branded Women, and The Brotherhood.
Jack Clayton: The Innocents, The Pumpkin Eater, and Our Mother's House.
Robert Mulligan: The Rat Race, The Great Impostor, The Spiral Road, To Kill a Mockingbird, Love with the Proper Stranger, Inside Daisy Clover, Baby the Rain Must Fall, Up the Down Staircase, and The Stalking Moon.
Satyajit Ray: Nyak, Two, Teen Kanya, Kanchenjungha, Devi, Rabindranath Tagore, Abhijan, Mahanagar, Aranyer Din Ratri, Chiriyakhana, Goopy Gyne Bagha Byne, Charulata, and Mahapurush.
Tony Richardson: Tom Jones, The Entertainer, A Subject of Scandal and Concern, A Taste of Honey, Sanctuary, Hamlet, Red and Blue, Laughter in the Dark, The Loved One, The Loneliness of the Long Distance Runner, Mademoiselle, The Sailor from Gibraltar, The Charge of the Light Brigade, and Laughter in the Dark.
Bryan Forbes: Séance on a Wet Afternoon,Whistle Down the Wind, King Rat,The L-Shaped Room, Deadfall, The Wrong Box, The Whisperers, and The Madwoman of Chaillot.
Richard Brooks: Elmer Gantry, In Cold Blood, The Happy Ending, Sweet Bird of Youth, Lord Jim, and The Professionals.
Claude Chabrol: Les Biches, The Unfaithful Wife, The Champagne Murders, Les Bonnes Femmes, Wise Guys, The Third Lover, Landru, Ophélia, Le Tigre aime la chair fraiche, Marie-Chantal contre le docteur Kha, Our Agent Tiger, The Road to Corinth, and This Man Must Die.
Mario Monicelli: The Passionate Thief, Casanova 70, Caprice Italian Style, The Girl with the Pistol, Organizer, L'armata Brancaleone, High Infidelity, and Sex Quartet.
Norman Jewison: In the Heat of the Night, The Thomas Crown Affair, The Cincinnati Kid, The Russians Are Coming, the Russians Are Coming, Gaily, Gaily, 40 Pounds of Trouble, The Thrill of It All, Send Me No Flowers, and The Art of Love.
Gillo Pontecorvo: The Battle of Algiers, Burn!, and Paras.
Ken Russell: Song of Summer, French Dressing, Women in Love, and Billion Dollar Brain
Ken Loach: Kes and Poor Cow.
Costa-Gavras: Z, Shock Troops, and The Sleeping Car Murders
Jacques Demy: The Umbrellas of Cherbourg, The Young Girls of Rochefort, Lola, Bay of Angels, and Model Shop.
Carol Reed: Oliver!, The Running Man, and The Agony and the Ecstasy.
Fred Zinnemann: A Man for All Seasons, The Sundowners, and Behold a Pale Horse.
Arthur Penn: The Chase, Alice's Restaurant, Bonnie and Clyde, The Miracle Worker, and Mickey One.
Agnes Varda: Cléo de 5 à 7, Le Bonheur, Lions from love, Les Créatures, and Loin du Vietnam.
Masaki Kobayashi: Harakiri, Samurai Rebellion, The Inheritance, A Soldier's Prayer, Hymn to a Tired Man, and Kwaidan.
Otto Preminger: Advise & Consent, Exodus, The Cardinal, Bunny Lake Is Missing, In Harm's Way, Skidoo, and Hurry Sundown.
Stanley Donen: Charade, Two for the Road, The Grass Is Greener, Surprise Package, and Once More, with Feeling!.
Nicholas Ray: The Savage Innocents, 55 Days at Peking, and King of Kings.
Luis García Berlanga: Long Live the Bride and Groom, Three Fables of Love, The Executioner, Plácido, and La boutique.
Walerian Borowczyk: Mr. and Mrs. Kabal's Theatre, Renaissance, and Goto, Island of Love.
Karel Reisz: Isadora, Saturday Night and Sunday Morning, Night Must Fall, and Morgan – A Suitable Case for Treatment.
Joseph Losey: Eva, The Criminal, The Damned, King and Country, The Servant, Boom!, Accident, Secret Ceremony, and Modesty Blaise.
Mark Robson: Daddy's Gone A-Hunting, Von Ryan's Express, The Prize, Valley of the Dolls, The Inspector, Nine Hours to Rama, Lost Command, and From the Terrace.
Richard Fleischer: Che!, Fantastic Voyage, The Big Gamble, Barabbas, The Boston Strangler, Doctor Dolittle, and Crack in the Mirror,
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Fear and Loathing in Beaumont, Texas - TDY Edition

This one is a doozy...
So, a fateful day around 2010ish I was in that dingleberry of a swampy butthole of land known as Fort Polk doing my train up for a deployment. That's a fucking story in itself.
Anyhow, the end of the rotation had occurred, the war against whatever made up name country was won, and we were returning from Polky-land to our dependapotamuses. I was on a contact high as I was personally selected to be a part of my Battalion Commander's personal security detachment and all our joes were hand-selected by the Platoon Leader, Platoon Sergeant, and myself so we had a really awesome platoon. How awesome? When we did an escort mission with the Chaplain meeting with local religious leader, at the end, our division chaplain told us that "You guys fucking rocked that shit. Gave me a fucking hardon. That's what this division is all about. Fuck yeah."
Preach on brother.
Fast forward, fast forward.
Anyhow, my Platoon Sergeant came to me and told me I needed to go to the bay where my Commander and First Sergeant were. My first thought was of deep consideration and reflection.
"Shit." This can't be good.
When I arrive, my First Sergeant's first question to me "Do you have government travel card?" I nodded a confirmation from our Operation BS in Egypt. He looks at me and says "No, you don't." What fucking Jedi mindtrick is this? Did I forget to pay off a debt? Will I be summoned straight to the Division CSM for a beheading as seems to be the operating procedure whenever government travel cards payments come into question. Casually, my commander slides a brigade memorandum towards me and motions for me to read it.
I start reading and realize it's a tasking memorandum stating what each company will provide from brigade.
Alpha Company...
Two NCOs and three soldiers. "Suckers."
Bravo Company...
Three soldiers. "Nerds."
Charlie Company...
Three E6 NCOs. "Lol, loooossers..."
Delta Company...
Staff Sergeant Pickleindabutt. "well fuck me in the butt."
BY NAME?! I was the only fucking individual chosen by MY GOD DAMN FULL NAME in this memorandum. How does brigade even know I exist? Why am I being tasked directly? Who put this memo together and how the fuck did they know my name. Who the fuck volun-told my name without me receiving a whisper of such curse. Suddenly it dawned on me and I realized what this tasking needed me for.
"hazmat"
Apparently I was the only person in brigade who could effectively fill out the forms for our HAZMAT containers. It started where I was just doing it for the company, moved to me declaring for battalion, and now BRIGADE is tracking me. AMO-62 qualification got me again and I was hand selected because my paperwork was the only one that kept getting cleared so they came after me.
My dudes and dudettes, I literally volunteered for this course to get me out of a field exercise so I could watch the SEC championship - no shit. I was a dumb grunt and I didn't even know what the course was and just wanted to get my Roll Tide on. I get there for class and they're like "This is for declaring hazardous material for shipment by land, sea, air, teleportation pods, Skynet time travel, and rail." My dumb ass E5 self was like "Lol, when the hell does any infantry dude declare HAZMAT. Cake."
A week later I was declaring HAZMAT for my brigade to Haiti so shows how well I could foreshadow things. You know how my paperwork always made it through? Let's break down the process.
Me arrive. Me find MSDSs for hazmat. Me find civilian inspector who is overshadowing the process.
"Yo, how do you want me to fill this out." Everyone else would be digging around the CFR 49 and I was just like "Lol, I can't read. Let me find the civilian who makes a career of this and ask them." And that's how I became the HAZMAT guy.
Fast forward, fast forward.
So now I'm part of a tasking that is ensuring our containers make it out of Beaumont, Texas. I already came to Polk on advance parties where I basically had AT&T screaming at me to stop using data while I watched all the episodes of Breaking Bad that was available at the time. Now I'm not even the rear detachment, I'm the past - I'm on fucking ice basically, a forgotten artifact of my brigade's Polk rotation. "Yall remember that one Staff Sergeant?... He told funny jokes... Whatever happened to him? I seem to recall him telling his soldiers to run over g-men at Polk whenever they surrounded his humvee while blatantly ignoring that a 50 cal was rocking them the whole time and then he just... vanished."
Fast forward, fast forward.
Me and two others will be grabbing a rental and driving to Beaumont. God damnit, I deploy in a few weeks and I'm already getting less time with my succubus future exwife that has a spending habit that makes Target wet thinking about it. Anyway, they move me to the brigade's bay. If you've never been to Polk, they have these hangers where they just stick a metric-fuck-ton of bunk beds when you're field rotation is over and you're either leaving or preparing for war with the g-men. The g-men are the Louisiana equivalent of Taliban and should never be trusted. They call themselves soldiers but they are the true enemy. While you're sludging through the swamps and wondering if you're in Vietnam, they come out of no where with their significantly enhanced miles laser gear and somehow your miles can never kill them. You just hear the beep of death of your gear to inform you that traitorous scum g-men nailed you. Probably for killing a Staff Sergeant they get a three day weekend or something.
So, here I am in the brigade headquarters and we just acquired a rental car with a fellow NCO and fresh out of the officer-oven Lieutenant. Lieutenant asks a fateful question "You guys want to go off base." Unfortunately I came to fight the g-men and did not know I was going to be traveling so I had no civilian clothes. So, we agree to go to Wal-Mart in town so I can buy the cheapest of the cheap threads since my wife at the time absolutely had to buy "live, laugh, love" useless items from retail stores at an alarming rate.
Listen to me, Polk is the middle of no where. It is a fucking swamp. I hated going there. I literally would shake the hands of people stationed there and tell them "You're in my thoughts and prayers." The place has a random wild horse herd and farm animals all over the place because people just dump their animals there. I had never left the base before and when we drove off I was basically like "Oh my..." It was like driving into a Flannery O'Connor novel but with strip clubs. There is absolutely nothing in Leesville but several strip clubs, a Wal-Mart, some shitty steakhouse, and trailers. Listen, I'm from Alabama and I was even like "Fuck. This isn't even deep south this is deepest south."
So anyway, I buy the literal cheapest threads from Wal-Mart for my journey to Beaumont and we decide to go into one of the strip clubs for a few drinks and... holy shit, this place was the most Jabba the Hutt's palace experience I have ever had except instead of Leia they had Jaba on the poles. I quietly order a beer, get propositioned for a backroom dance from a human opossum and could only quietly respond "No thank you I'm Christian" in an attempt to ward off others, and wonder how the fuck am I going to get this LT to drink his beer faster so we can fucking leave.
Fast forward, fast forward.
We finally arrived to Beaumont and check in our hotel. I'm suffering from a wicked hangover from the night before in Lake Charles which had about 10 women for each male at the bar we went to. When we get to the hotel, we all agree that we just want to get some food and the clerk recommends this Cajun themed restaurant down the road. We go there and there were no tables but three open seats at the bar so we chose that. As always, Army guys are only just going to talk about the fucking Army so we proceed with our usual dose of bitching and whinnying.
Suddenly, this older gent leads forward sitting beside us and says "YALL IN THE SERVICE?!"
"Sure 'nuff."
"YALL DEPLOYED!?"
"We have and we're heading back to Iraq in a few months."
"FOOD AND DRINKS ON ME - BARTENDER, SHOTS OF TEQUILA FOR ALL OF US AND MY MISSUS"
"That's not necessary sir we-"
"SHUT THE FUCK UP. FOOD - DRINKS ON ME."
And that's how I met who I will refer to as Chief. I call him Chief because later he told me he was a Navy veteran and later he told me he was a Seal - like 98% of Navy veterans you meet. Chief had his lovely girlfriend with him and was the loudest fucking Texan in a bar full of Texans. He was pretty funny but mind you I'm still dealing with this wicked hangover and really just wanted sleep. We eat our respective meals and have a few more shots and beers.
"WHAT'S YOUR PLANS TONIGHT!?"
"We're tired so we were just goin-"
"NOT IN MY TOWN ON A FRIDAY NIGHT. YOU BOYS ARE MEETING UP WITH ME."
"That's really not neces-"
"YOU HAVE TO TAKE MY OFFER BECAUSE I PAID YOUR MEALS AND DRINKS AND YOU'D BE DICKS IF OTHERWISE, MEET ME AT CHILI'S."
Well, fuck. Fair point. We ended up driving to this random Chili's after exchanging texts with them and shit. My LT is all worked up and excited like a puppy because he's hoping they're a rich couple who want to rain down upon us the riches of the world for THX 4 UR SERVICE. I'm more in the tune of thought that they're swingers and probably want untie one of our balloon knots in some heated up sexcapade.
All the sudden, this SUPED the fuck up Mustang pulls up beside us.
"HEY YALL SEEN SOME ARMY DOUCHEBAGS!?" as the window rolls down.
"I'm sorry, we're not like submarines or Marines, you can't go down on us sir."
"HA! LET'S SEE IF THAT PIECE OF SHIT CAN KEEP UP"
"It's a fucking rental Dodge of course it won't-" his Mustang goes flying off 2 Fast 2 Furious style. The Lieutenant is driving as I watch this Mustang Toyko-fucking-drift into the highway.
"Slow down and ask him the location by text. I don't want to die on the road." So Chief proceeds to text us the location of where they are heading. And of course, strip club. We pull up and it's about the nicest fucking strip club I have ever seen. Polar opposite to that fucking swamp trailer we had seen before. I'm walking in my Wal-Mart bin threads clothes like "Fuck I'm not dressed for this shit."
There's another couple with Chief now who introduce themselves to us. They're roughly around his age and married. Oh yeah, we are totally in a swinger situation. One of us is going to have to pay the dues and it isn't me. We walk in and sit down at this table and this place is two stories. Huge. Multiple dancers everywhere.
"ALL DRINKS ON ME, YOU WANT A DANCE, PUT IT ON MY CARD." He then proceeds to pull out $300 in ones and shuffles them to each of us so we total $100 each. Dude. WTF is this. Then he proceeds to buy a tray of jello shots and puts that on the table. At this time, a Mafiaso looking dude walks up to us in a nice suit.
"Thank you for getting the VIP section. Just so you're aware, you will have to purchase a $500 dollar bottle of champagne or a $1000 bottle." What. The. Fuck. We're in the VIP section of this club? Holy shit, how much does that cost? Here I am dressed in clothes that probably in total cost $17.67 and about to be drinking a bottle of $500 champagne.
"I DON'T WANT CHAMPAGNE! I WANT SOME REAL LIQUOR!" Gents and gentettes, I proceed to watch this man argue with the owner that he wants Captain Morgan over champagne. I am now at a loss of processing this TDY adventure. Finally the owner agrees to Captain Morgan but it will still cost $500 dollars.
He agrees. I just witnessed a man pay $500 dollars for a bottle of Captain Morgan. That I am almost positive that we never opened. I shit you not. I am holding back on throwing this dude's cash around because I'm still worried about the whole swinger aspect and them getting some soldier butthole later in the night when the festivities end.
Fast forward, fast forward.
Night ends. We bid our farewells to Chief and his friends. None of us was required to fuck one of them. Other NCO didn't drink at all so he drives us back to the hotel so we can finally crash. We do. TDY adventure now can get official and we can focus on our containers like professionals...
Hold fast. Rewind, rewind.
It's a Saturday. We don't have shit we can do. I'm awoken early in the morning by a knock at my door in which I answer and the Lieutenant is standing there with Chief on speaker yelling about jet-skis or some shit. wat?
"He said he told you that we were going on his boat today." Umm.... negative.
"MEET ME AT THE DOCKS" Chief yells on the phone and hangs up.
So, we ended up meeting them at whatever lake is near Beaumont and let me tell you what... I would have given up my butthole for the amount of fun we had on his boat and jet skis. Jesus Christ, that was one of the funnest days of my life. I had never ridden a jet ski before but was going nuts on it. In less than two hours of meeting up with him, I'm driving a jet ski for the first time in my life trying to keep up with his fucking boat so I don't lose him. I don't really have much to add to that but god damn jet skis are amazing.
Fast forward, fast forward.
So we get the boat back to the dock and, in case I didn't mention, it was Chief, his girlfriend, and the other couple I mentioned before. I hear them talking about going to some boat casino with a Jack Daniels restaurant. Chief's friend keeps telling me they make a steak that is so good you will want to "fuck it on the floor to relieve your erection" which I believe is a high compliment. They get ready to leave and we bid our farewells.
"THE FUCK ARE YALL TALKING ABOUT, SEE YOU THERE." Well okay, I guess we're going to a boat casino lol wtf. We go to a casino and they park the boat at the docks. I proceed to watch these fools drop mad money after eating a steak that I'm not sure I would call floor fucking worthy but pretty damn good. They then proceed to go nuts on the gambling. I mean fucking leaving me at their table with like $1,000 dollars so they could take a quick piss and I don't even gamble so I just stood there like a lost child. At one point, I notice Chief is missing so I decide to go check his boat.
Lo and behold, there he is swimming in the dock with his boat blaring music loud as fuck. As I am walking towards the concert, there is literally a party of people dancing to his music outside of a hotel room on a balcony. I walk down and he's climbing back in. About this time, the other NCO from my merry band of adventurers walks up to. Chief asks what service-members carry now in the Army and proceeds to pull a glock out of his boat glove compartment.
Alrighty now... I don't really care much for someone to be intoxicated and holding a gun. "Hey you should probably put-"
BANG
Mother. Fucker. Fucking. Fuck. FUCK. He totally just fired a round into the water. We are at a god damn casino and on the casino property. We are so about to taken the fuck down into depths of hell that I have never seen before. That dancing crew that I mentioned early, they're gone. Andddddd here comes security. Two behemoths of security guards heading our way. Once again, I go into the fucking zone and start walking towards them.
"HEY DID SOMEONE FIRE A GUN OVER HERE!?"
"Hey brother, that shit scared the fuck out of me."
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN?"
"It must have been like a boat backfire or something. I thought for sure it was a gunshot at first. I think the water made it sound weird. Scared the fuck out of me."
"How do you know it wasn't!?"
"Oh I'm in the Army bro. That shit made me think someone was shooting at us."
"Oh... Okay... You cool?"
"Yeah, I'm good man. Just spooked me."
"You need a drink? On the house if nee-"
"Nah, I'm good man. Thank you though. Have a nice night."
And that's how I avoided being taken into casino prison.
Fast forward, fast forward.
We bid our farewells and return back to the hotel. Sunday I get a call from Chief's friend who I will refer to as "Victor" calls me and asks if we would like to get a few Sunday beers. We agree and meet at this chill local bar and are just shooting the shit.
District Attorney for the area happen to be sitting in there and buys us rounds. God damn Texas really does fucking love the military, Jesus. At this time another older gentleman that knows Victor sits beside me and greets Victor. He asks me if I had deployed and I told him I had and was heading back over.
"I thought my war was bad, I feel bad for your situation with those bombs they put on the roads. Scary stuff."
"You were in?"
"Army, Vietnam. I was a forward observer."
This dude then proceeds to tell me stories about hiding in the brush from dog handlers who were hunting them down since they were forward observers. He proceeds to mention that if it wasn't for some Native American teaching them how to hide their scent, he would have been found. Basically learned how to rub shit on themselves so they could evade dog handlers. I'm sitting there in dismay at how he felt bad for my war... I may have gone into Iraqi shit creeks more than I cared for but I wasn't purposely rubbing shit in my hair so I could be behind deadly frontlines.
He then proceeds to talk about a battle he was in. How they were being overran at one point by the Vietnamese.
"We lost a lot of good men that day. Lots of friends." A slight tear rolls down his cheek and I saw him brush it away. You can usually spot a bull shitter with their gloats of heroism and valor. You know you're dealing with a man who had seen some shit when eyes water. A man who had seen some real hard shit in the bush. I could be wrong but I got the feeling he was the type that buried his experiences deep into his mind and never really got the chance to express his memories. He was a successful construction owner but I'm sure he still has nights judging by what he was telling me. Only to be probably spit on when he came home.
He asks to be excused so he can piss.
"I never knew he was in the service nor in Vietnam..." Victor says.
"I've known him for over 15 years and I had no clue." Bartender says.
Gentleman comes back and I ask if I can buy him a beer for his service as he had bought one for me. He agrees. Victor ended up picking up the tab before I could pay for that round. God damnit can I not fucking pay for anything here? I give him a firm handshake when I leave and tell him it was nice to meet him. Later I gave Victor my Combat Infantryman Badge and asked him to give it to the gentleman. Tell him I appreciate him telling me stories and mad respect for a man who had been through some real shit. While we were talking, he said something along the lines of not getting anything like infantry guys. Normally this would be debate worthy to me but I'm not saying shit to this gentleman. He's been through it.
"Does it mean anything when I give it to him?"
"Means essentially nothing but maybe it will be something to him."
Fast forward. I'm going to skip the part of going to a Roller Derby team after-party at a strip club where I saw behemoth sized women picking up strippers and toss money at them left and right. That was another doozy of a day. They were more crazy in the strip club than I had ever seen any crowd be.... Coming from a survivor of Fayettenam's strip club venues, that means something.
Alright. I'm on my final day and I've left a fuck ton more shit out of this story that occurred down in Beaumont for respectful reasons. We had to leave abruptly so I was on my last night. I went down to the hotel bar that I had gone into a few times. The bartender Steve was like the youngest 50 year old dude I had ever seen. I thought he was younger than me. Apparently my man Steve is a millionaire with a landscaping business and I ask him why he bartends and he says "Because of the funny fucking stories I get to hear from dudes like you." Oh, okay, word.
This other dude is sitting beside me and asks if I was in the Army as I well telling Steve the shit show of an experience I had since being in Beaumont.
"I was in too. I didn't go overseas or nothing like you did." I then proceed to have a very meaningful conversation with this dude on how he shouldn't look at it that way. He served and if called upon, he would have answered too. I offer to buy him a drink. He agrees and I ask Steve for a glass of their best scotch at the bar for both of us. I'm paying something in this god damn town before I leave. Just fucking something. I haven't dropped a dollar since Wal-Mart basically and this place has been so fucking kind to me, I'm putting something into Beaumont's economy. So help me God.
We talk. We finish our drinks. We shake hands. He departs. I look at Steve and realize that this will wrap up this adventure. My precious Beautmont adventure. What a time. You have been so kind and generous to me. Now it's time to pay for something for this town. Here we go.
"Get me tab Steve."
"It's on the house, Pickleindabutt."
FUUUUUUUUUUUCK.
I go on this rant about how everyone is paying everything for me and fuck let me just buy a round. Steve is laughing at me and refuses.
"JUST LET ME BUY AN RC COLA STEVE, SHIT!"
I finally convince him to give me $0.00 receipt and leave him a $20 dollar tip.
The next day we get back into uniform and realize we grossly did not estimate our trip to the airport accurately at all so we are speeding away from lovely Beaumont to whatever airport we needed to get to in Louisiana. While speeding we get pulled over by some Louisiana state trooper. He walks up to the passenger side where I am sitting at.
"Who the hell do you think you are speeding like - what the hell, yall going to war or something?" when he sees the uniforms.
"Well, we're trying to make our flight at the so we can go to Iraq."
Ehhh, not a lie necessarily...
"Alright, after you pass the next state trooper at the end of the coming construction zone, you should be able to gun it the rest of the way there. Be safe now!" Wasn't expecting that response but we'll take it.
And that was that. I went back to Fort Bragg. Beaumont's adventure was over and I somehow managed to survive. I came back on a regular workday night and went to bed. Woke up to my Staff Duty desk calling me at like 5am and my dumb ass Sergeant Major was on the line which is not what I wanted...
"Hey SSG Pickle! Were you trying to fucking kill yourself!?"
Dear God, did my Sergeant Major catch wind of all that was going down in Beaumont. I wasn't posting it on social media. Does he know the shennanigans? We got the containers through. Did he catch rumors of his Staff Sergeant parading around in strip clubs, almost crashing a jet ski, partying with Roller Derby girls, having to sit around a hospital waiting area for a day, being selected to be a special guest for a crawfish cook-off... Could they question my professionalism? Am I losing my spot on the security detachment. Did I fill out hazmat paperwork wrong?... What could this mean.
"Uh... negative."
"Oh shit wrong SSG, never mind." Hangs up.
Get a text from my Platoon Sergeant who is acting 1SG at this time and he's basically like "Come in today, now." I get there and he's basically like "Yeah everything has gone to shit for this pre-deployment. I need you in here." Whatever, that's fine. He's solid so I know it's the truth.
"By the way, how was that trip to Beaumont?"
"bro."
submitted by PickleInDaButt to MilitaryStories [link] [comments]

Welcome to the B.L.o.K. (Big List of Kelowna)

Tons of posts are asking about this town (mine included), so I decided to go through the /kelowna history and put all the responses in a central place. It can be a guide for visitors and Kelowna newbies in general. All the information has been gathered exclusively from posts here. If you'd like to add anything to the list, or see any errors, reply below and I'll add it to the main post below. (Mods, if this is long-term useful, you can sticky it.)

Activities & Things To Do

Indoor

Outdoor

Barber

Bike Rental

Breweries / Craft Beer

Camping

BC Parks Campgrounds Reserve

Other Camping

Concert Hosts / Weeklies / Promoter Events

Dispensaries

Dog Parks

Festivals & Annual Large Events

Fly Fishing

Food and Restaurants

Asian

Chinese

Dog-friendly

Good for Groups

Indian

Ramen

Thai

Brunch

French

Hamburgers

Italian

Mexican / Comida Latina

Pies

Pizza

Subs / Sandwhiches

Sushi

Tasting Menus

Steakhouse

Vegan & Vegetarian

Not Dedicated Vegan, but a Decent Vegan Selection

Wineries

Wings

Gaming

Gyms

Hiking

Ice Skating

Internet Service Providers

Live Music

Mountain Biking

Nightlife / Clubs

Places to Avoid

Real Estate Agents

Salons

Hair

Nails

Skiing & Snowboarding

Local, within 90 minutes

Within a few hours drive

Helicopter

Cross Country & Nordic

Strippers

Swimming Pools

Taxis / Driver Service

(There's no Uber or Lyft in Kelowna)

Tailor

Tattoos

Theatre

Thrift Stores / Consignment Stores

Veterinarians

Watch Hockey

Wineries

Yoga

submitted by Indy_Pendant to kelowna [link] [comments]

What's Happening in CT 10/17 - 10/20

Thursday, October 17th, 2019:

Friday, October 18th, 2019:
Saturday, October 19th, 2019:
Sunday, October 20th, 2019:
How about check out a newly released movie this weekend!
You can also check this link out for a ton more events all around CT!
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User Suggested Events:
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I think it was removed because I posted o my Tumblr. Sorry!
submitted by SheCalledMePaul to Connecticut [link] [comments]

120 Urban Hooks

I see this post so often, and I'm amazed that people have trouble of thinking of things to do in an urban environment, so I thought I'd lend a hand.
Thanks as always to The Gollicking members, Mimir-ion, Zweefer, RexiconJesse, u/arc_onyx, InfinityCircuit and DeathMcGunz.
I've built a lot of cities. I find that its best to categorize.
Here's my personal city encounters lists, slightly altered with worldbuilding details to be more generic and useful. They are yours to take, amend, and discard, with my thanks.
There are 6 categories, with 20 entries for each category, giving us 120 encounters. (160 with the comment, below)
A d6 and a d20 can dice up a full roster of stuff to do quite quickly. Enjoy!

ARTS (01)

  1. Free outdoor art gallery with paintings, sculpture, food vendors and musicians. A note is passed to the party from a stranger.
  2. A new play from a famous playwright is debuting at the local theater. The party receives an invitation from an anonymous source via a messenger.
  3. A street band is playing raucous tunes outside the party's lodgings and a crowd prevents them from entering. If they persist, they accidentally start a brawl.
  4. A festival is being held in the city and all citizens and visitors are required to attend and pay fealty to the city's ruler. During the parade an explosion destroys some buildings and kills nearly 100 people. The party is very close to the blast and sees a hooded figure fleeing via rooftop.
  5. A local busker who always recites bad elven poetry is found one morning turned to stone.
  6. A band of mimes have come to the city to perform a series of comedy shows. One of the mimes is a Doppleganger and is here to assassinate one of the party's allies.
  7. A dance troupe, known for their public and surprise appearances (a "flashmob"), starts a performance in and around the party in the street. During the performance one of the dancers lunges at one of the party members and whispers, "Help me" in their ear, before carrying on with the spectacle.
  8. A mysterious sculpture garden has "sprouted" in a main city street, seemingly grown from the very ground itself. All of the figures are depictions of body horror and some spectators have been driven mad or died after looking at them for too long.
  9. Artist paints caricature portraits of passers-by which come to life at night to cause havoc.
  10. There is a sand castle contest at the local beach. While digging a pit one contestant finds a wooden chest. It is sealed with arcane sigils and very dangerous. Inside is a lifeform.
  11. The party is asked to investigate a local art gallery as the last known location of a model that has disappeared. The party finds extremely life like statues of various people, missing model included, and discovers the sculptor is a Maedar, with a pet Basilisk, trying to replicate his dead mate (a Medusa).
  12. The party is invited to a studio for free painting lessons. The paint fumes trigger a spell that sends the party into a collective Dream. They must find their way out and defeat the Artist-Wizard and his pet Nothic before they are bled dry (to fuel a hideous ritual).
  13. An audience-participation theater-event is occurring in one of the parks, and the party is encouraged to join, and are asked to put on some simple costumes. Upon doing so, they are swapped with hidden Clones, who continue the performance, while the party is teleported to an underground prison full of holding cells. There are dozens of other trapped citizens there.
  14. A new popular song is all the rage and being sung by drunken bravos and university students alike. The song has a 10% to transfer an audio-parasite, that will drive the singer mad and ultimately into a catatonic state over the course of 7 days. During this time they will be compelled to sing the “hook” over and over, in the hopes of infecting any nearby listeners.
  15. A master tattooist has set up a temporary shop on the fringes of the city. For a hefty fee, the customer will receive an exquisite piece of personal art, and on full moons, the tattoo will be able to sense the presence of magic, poisons, disease, or creature types (DMs choice). The master will leave after 24 hours, never to be seen again and the tattoo will fade completely after 30 days.
  16. An artist is painting landscapes on the street. She says she’ll paint any place the customer desires. For a fee, she can make the painting a one-time portal to that place. The portals always go to the wrong location (this is discovered after travel has occurred).
  17. A local homeless man, who mimes for money along the Promenade and in the Park, suddenly finds his invisible walls and pretend ropes are real. Passersby run into invisible walls of force left behind by him, people are dragged to him by his invisible rope, and he now hides in a corner of the park, afraid he will hurt others with this newfound power. The local Telekinesis Guild (bunch of filthy impostors and con artists, mostly) are furious that he has what they secretly do not, and has put a bounty on him, paid upon live delivery to their guild house.
  18. A local street band is performing the show of their life and the music has become magical. Any Bards present will be able to “draw” 1-3 new spells from the performance. All others will be Blessed for the next 48 hours.
  19. An artist has set up a crude telescope, pointing at the ground. For a small fee, you can look through the telescope and see a miniature world, full of tiny blue humanoids in a stone-age environment. The telescope is enchanted with a very detailed Major Illusion spell that allows the humanoids to be seen, and is also Cursed to drive the viewer mad by causing them to see the tiny blue humanoids everywhere they go. The curse will begin 24 hours after using the telescope and will persist for 30 days or until the victim goes mad, or dies. The Curse will manifest the humanoids as watching, then menacing, then threatening, then murderous.
  20. Some Elven sculptors have set up a “Century Garden” - plinths of stone overhung by apparatus with funnels in different angles and locations that drip acids onto the stone - slowly forming the final form of the artists vision. The artist is selling tickets (valid in 100 years) to attend the ceremony.

NIGHTLIFE (02)

  1. A local tavern is showcasing a new lager and a spruiker is on the streets handing out "1/2 off" coupons to passersby. The party is given "2 free drinks" coupons on purpose by the NPC. A stranger is waiting inside that wants to talk to the party.
  2. A dance club, on a typical night, has been infiltrated by an Avatar of Bacchus and has caused the party to spill into the streets where it has been pulling in passersby. The party is caught up in the crowd.
  3. An exclusive nightclub has opened, membership only. One of the party’s allies goes missing and was last seen there. The club is a coven of Sorcerers and every night they sacrifice a kidnapped customer to try to summon an Eldritch Horror.
  4. A hot club in town is secretly run by vampires. Cover charge is 1 pint of blood. Thralls being thralls, one of them talks, and a Hunter has gotten wind of the nest. The party will see him interrogating a thrall and escalating to torture.
  5. A drunken brawl spills out of a tavern near the party. The fight is brutal, involving makeshift weapons and ends up overtaking the party. If they do not flee, during the fracas the party notices that one of the brawlers is biting his opponents and swallowing the flesh. If they do flee, they hear the next day that a pile of half-eaten bodies was discovered in the aftermath. A new zombie-master has come to town.
  6. While out drinking, the party sees a Silver Elf enter the tavern, and time slows to 50% of its current speed for all but the party and Elf, who remain at 100%. The Elf asks the party if they would like to play a game of chess. If they say no, the Elf vanishes, and time returns to normal. If they agree they must wager a precious/strong/important memory against the answer to any question. The Elf has an INT modifier of +4 and a +4 proficiency in gaming. Upon the conclusion of the game, the Elf vanishes and time returns to normal. The bar patrons never see the Elf.
  7. While in a tavern, a game of darts among some locals concludes in violence and 2 end up dead. On one of the deceased bodies is a treasure map that leads to a guarded vault in the wilderness.
  8. A particularly virulent STD is going around the brothels. Over the course of 72 hours it turns the afflicted into a receptor for mental dominance from a powerful psion. The “Mind Taker” uses these puppets to rob the afflicted and deliver their valuables to a guarded location. Then the psion drains the puppet of its final mental faculties and stores it as an energy source for later. The bodies are then destroyed using a Rod of Disintegration. One of the party’s allies (or a party member themselves) has come down with a case of “The Threads” (so named for the red lines of infection radiating from the genitalia into the legs and torso.
  9. A dance club has been cursed by a witch to afflict some (30%) of the customers with “Otiluke’s Irresistible Dance”. Some patrons have been dropping dead from it and the club owners are covering it up by secretly burying the bodies in the basement and drugging the witnesses. The party is present for this or one of their allies goes missing.
  10. A man attempting to throw a party so massive he will officially become “the God of Partying” wants the players to help him throw an absolute rager. If they help, he will remember them fondly when he reaches godhood. The party could overrun the region/city.
  11. The party finds a club throwing a rager in the party’s honor. All night, people toast the party members, dance with them, and celebrate. No one in the party has to pay for drinks. The next day, the party gets the bill for everyone's drinks. The tavern was told the event was for the party and would be paid for by them as well.
  12. A new fad in the high-end taverns of the city, catering to young noblemen with too much money and not enough sense, is a drink called The Kiss. One part grain alcohol, one part pufferfish venom - a shot of this causes hallucinations and numbness, in addition to more than the usual drunkenness. Two young men, heirs to fortunes and titles in the court, have died in the last two nights. Word is they drank too many of these. The noble families want blood, and put bounties on all known bartenders serving This Kiss. The guard don’t want a riot on their hands if they interfere with the Mixologist’s Guild, the most powerful multinational trade guild in the world. A representative from the Crown has summoned the party, to discreetly investigate the explosive situation.
  13. A group of drunks stumble towards the party and push through/past them. During this, the party will each be subject to a Pickpocket attempt (+8 Sleight of Hand). If discovered, the “drunks” are a pack of rogues who “own” this territory. If challenged, they will flee and return with a number of Thugs equal to the number of party members.
  14. A grifter comes up to the party and bets that they can guess “where you got your boots/shoes”. The answer is “on your feet” (where the footwear currently is). The grifter will demand a small amount of cash after this, and will become hostile if denied or hassled.
  15. An avatar of Bacchus/Dionysus appears in the area and begins a Revel. Those who hear the music or see the dancing/drinking must save vs Wisdom (DC 20) or join in. The Revel will last for 72-96 hours and leave partygoers with 3 levels of Exhaustion (and be many miles from where it started).
  16. A Dwarven “thrashgnome” band is throwing an impromptu concert on the roof of a local tavern. The noise is deafening and a large brawl will erupt after awhile - during the fracas an object will find itself at the feet of one of the party members. It is a powerful Fetish that was stolen from a Witch (who has been seeking it, and is nearby).
  17. The party enters a tavern to discover their money is “no good” and they are suddenly crowned “Lager Kings/Queens” for the night, and feted and welcomed by each individual tavern patron. The party will, as the sun rises, be poisoned by the insinuative poison that was in each successive drink, and if they fail a Con check vs a high DC, they will be magically Sleep’ed and find themselves strapped to a basement altar for a hatchling Gold Dragon to feed upon. If they succeed on the check, they are very ill and considered Incapacitated for the next 24 hours.
  18. A new tavern has appeared in the area, and will vanish after the night’s festivities to appear in a random location in the world the next night. The tavern patrons are all Fey, and this is the “Wandering Druid Pub”.
  19. A dealer is handing out “free tokes” of a new narcotic. The narcotic is powerful and hallucinatory, but harmless otherwise, except for the addiction rate, which is near 100%. A Con check vs a high DC is required. If failed, the user must take the drug again in the next 24 hours or suffer 2 levels of Fatigue. Every day without the drug thereafter confers another level of Fatigue. If the check is passed, they will become violently nauseous every time they take the drug again.
  20. A group of Gnomish Brewmasters have set up a tasting booth on the street and are giving out free samples of “Old Brown Mare” - a powerful stout that has a tiny side effect - 10% of the imbibers are shrunk to Gnomish height for 24 hours.
  21. (OPTIONAL) - A cadre of bound Incubi and Succubi have escaped from a brothel and are desperately seeking an escape from the area. They will make any deal possible to make this happen.

SHOPPING (03)

  1. While looking for weapons, a party member "accidentally" activates a sentient weapon, who declares the party member as "master" and demands to know what has happened since it was "put to sleep".
  2. While shopping, one or more of the party members is pickpocketed by a young kid who is part of an "urchin gang". This gang is an arm of one of the more powerful rogue guilds in the city.
  3. A street vendor is selling “gag gifts”, guaranteed to ensure the perfect prank. All the objects are cursed, and the vendor reveals this as if they were joking, as part of the shtick.
  4. Upon purchasing a normal mundane item, it is found to be hollow, with an unknown substance hidden inside of it. If left undiscovered, the person who sold it will try to get the item back, by negotiation or violence, it depends on the party’s willingness to part with it.
  5. A certain type of plush toy is all the rage in this city, and the party will acquire one upon their next purchase - all the merchants were paid to distribute these as “customer incentives.” The toys act as scrying focus for the local thieves guild. The party’s lodgings will be robbed within 24 hours obtaining the toy.
  6. An extraordinary amount of the richer folk of the town have gathered on the plaza. Gregory’s Golden Garments has arrived back in town from one of his far-off trading junkets. He brings the most exclusive textiles and materials to town, and the auction has started (dragon-skins, silk, etc.). During the auction, someone purchases a rare bolt of material and the party finds it in their room later, with instructions to hide it. If they don’t, a group of Assassins come looking for it. If they do, they will be contacted by a mysterious agent who asks them to transport it far away for a hefty fee.
  7. An Annual Food Festival kicks off with much fanfare. However, someone has poisoned the foodstuffs and half the city is sick with nausea and other vile emissions. The organisers, afraid to lose their heads, have set a hefty bounty for finding the culprit(s), and one of these pamphlets is pushed on the party.
  8. While shopping for weapons, a woman approaches the party and asks them to sell a weapon for her, as she cannot. She explains that the weapon is Cursed and will not allow itself to be sold by the owner. If the party agrees, she looks visible relieved and hands the item over. Now the weapon belongs to the party member who took it (and it cannot be sold). The item is a -1 weapon.
  9. A small purse keeps whispering at a player for them to buy it. It remains silent when others are observing it and refuses to talk if it thinks anyone else can hear it. It says it can help them (count money, hide it from pickpockets, and offer insight) if they give it something in return (it wants costly gemstones).
  10. Every store and restaurant the party enters seems to be run by the same person. If confronted, they laugh and say they “get that all the time”, but will profess ignorance otherwise. The merchants are all Dopplegangers and today is their “Day of Pranks”. If two merchants are forced together, they will become violent and the others will run out to join them.
  11. The party finds a flyer shoved under their lodging’s door that promises “75% off all Adventuring Gear” at a local merchant. The merchant is very chatty and inquisitive and will press the party for information about where they are going next. The merchant then sells this information to a gang of rogues who will follow the party and attempt to rob them as they exit the dungeon.
  12. While shopping for clothes, a party member hears a weeping noise. No one around seems to be crying, so if this is investigated, the member finds a top hat that seems to be the source. If the hat is put on, the party member is Cursed with a particularly nasty form of melancholia.
  13. The next time an item of clothing is purchased, the party member discovers that it has a large “Pocket Dimension” concealed within its folds. There is an object already inside the pocket.
  14. A beautiful man/woman approaches the lowest CHA party member and offers to make their “dreams come true” if they will sell their soul. The man/woman will cast a real Wish on behalf of the party member (which works without the usual DM fuckery, but will expire in 1 year, and a group of Devils will appear to collect the player’s soul). If refused, the man/woman will leave, but if confronted, they will flee. The man/woman is a mortal humanoid who simply shills for a Crossroads Devil.
  15. While shopping for arrows/projectiles, the merchant offers the party a “one-time deal” of some special projectiles that are “guaranteed to strike their target every time” and will demonstrate this quality in a shooting lane set up in the back of the shop. The projectile will work as promised within the shop itself, without limit, but outside the shop, the first 3 only will work as promised and the rest will automatically fail-to-hit. If confronted later, the shopkeeper will claim ignorance and claim the party member is lying (even going so far as to call the Watch for harassment).
  16. The city is having a 50% sale, city-wide, for the next 24 hours. Rogues know this too, and are everywhere, preying on the crowds, or following them home to be robbed later.
  17. While shopping for provisions, the merchant says they are looking for “exotic meat hunters”, and will pay top prices for “anything unusual” without limit, provided the meat is delivered dressed.
  18. A new confectionery store has opened and is giving away free samples in the streets. The sweets are mildly intoxicating, and have the added side-effect of making those who eat them very amorous for the next 8 hours. The owners are clerics of the Deity of Love.
  19. An arsonist is burning down merchant shops, by “category”. The perpetrator is a failed businessperson themselves, and is merely seeking revenge. The first things burned are the weapon and armor shops.
  20. While shopping for armor, the merchant offers to show the party a “special selection” of exotic armor. These are all very unusual and very expensive. This is a one-time offer that will never be repeated and if confronted, the merchant will claim ignorance as to the existence of the exotic armors, and if the shop is searched, they are nowhere to be found.

ENTERTAINMENT (04)

  1. The party receives an anonymous gift of entry passes to an exclusive and private club in the city. At the club, the party is approached by cultists who attempt to persuade the party into joining.
  2. The museum is showcasing some rare artifacts. While visiting, the party is present during the brazen theft of one of the objects - an item of unique and dangerous powers.
  3. Zoo animals have escaped and are menacing the population!
  4. A local sage sends an urgent message to the party about a matter of great importance. The sage, a bit senile, has gotten mixed up and this is not the group he was supposed to contact. He does not realize this and treats the party as if they were hired to retrieve a book from an old, guarded crypt. If the party refuses, the Sage will eventually be foolish enough to try it himself and the party will hear about his death.
  5. A public estate sale of one of the city’s wealthiest families is announced. The prices are high, but the quality equally impressive. In the announcement is an object that the party or one of the party members has been looking for. If they attend the sale, they discover the price is three times higher than they can afford (even after pooling money or getting a loan). The security is strong but not impossible...
  6. The museum is showcasing the preserved remains of a long-dead monster race as part of a traveling exhibition. During a tour, or at night when closed, the monsters are revived by an interested party, and they go on a murderous spree. They attack either the party (along with many others) or one of the party’s allies.
  7. A series of foreign street magicians has entered town and perform solo acts all over town. One of them is near the party, and they need a volunteer for a (permanent) disappearing act.
  8. A street corner storyteller is spinning a tale of adventure and peril to a crowd. The tale sounds suspiciously like the last adventure the party had.
  9. While eating, the party sees a puppet show happening nearby. They find it (magically) difficult to avert their eyes from the felt performers and can see figures moving out of the corners of their eyes. These are Oblique Golems, and can only move when not being viewed. The golems will attempt to rob anyone nearby. The puppets are just puppets.
  10. An Escape Room boasts a valuable prize for any group who can escape/solve the room before the hourglass fills. Several of the puzzles in the escape room align runes and involve magic words of power. If the party manages to complete the room, they complete the spell, finding a portal now open above the building. Demons pour from it into the town, and it cannot be closed for at least 24 hours.
  11. Some fire-jugglers are performing in the street, and they appear to be using magic to create illusionary figures that leap from the burning torches. These are actually Mephits, and the fire-jugglers did not summon them, they appeared on their own. They run off to cause havoc and burn as much of the city as they can.
  12. A local casino is offering big prizes to “Spin the Wheel” - with only a 5% chance of winning, this is mostly a scam, but those who play are Wizard-Marked to be robbed later. The prizes for actually winning are 4-figures.
  13. A pig-racing track has been cordoned off - turning the streets into the racecourse. All are welcome to enter, and whoever wins is offered a lucrative contract joining the “Hog Ridin’ Circuit” - a racing tournament involving half-a-dozen cities and some very shady dealings.
  14. A masked spruiker hands the party an ornately engraved thin metal plaque inviting them to an exclusive event at a place called “The Garden”, and a map is etched on the reverse side. The event, if attended, presents the party with an opportunity to travel to another plane and earn the favor of a powerful, if enigmatic figure.
  15. A group of acrobats are performing feats and stunts in the street. During the performance, one of the party members sees the face of one of the tumblers momentarily change into something monstrous.
  16. A pair of dueling Illusionists is staging an elaborate mock-battle in a nearby park, but neglected to inform anyone of this beforehand and have caused a panic.
  17. A tour group suddenly appears and engulfs the party. The guide is pointing out places where famous adventurers have died, and suddenly points right where the party is standing and begins discussing them as if they were not there! The tour group can not be interacted with (as they are projections from the future) and soon quickly departs and vanishes around a corner.
  18. A street lottery is being held by a local neighborhood social group. The cost is low and any tickets purchased are said to go towards upgrading the local park. There is a 50% that the party wins a modest prize of home-baked goods. The locals will send a message to the party later that their tickets were fraudulent and demand a return of the prize or the equivalent value in currency. This “lottery” is a common scam run in the area on obvious tourists.
  19. During an previous-announced free concert by some famous Bards, a bomb explodes.
  20. A street comedian is inadvertently casting “Tasha’s Hideous Laughter” on audience members. The phenomenon is soon discovered and the comedian flees. Later, he is found dead and covered in a thin slime.

SPORTS (05)

  1. The party receives an anonymous gift of tickets to a local sporting match. If they attend, they are approached by an NPC who says they represent a "person who wishes to remain nameless, but desires to procure your services in a delicate, and potentially dangerous matter."
  2. The party is invited by a local ally to attend a boxing match. At the match both fighters are killed by a powerful assassin who works in secret for a local politician.
  3. The party attends a game of skill and is accused of bribing a ref to throw the game by a rogue (who did actually rig the fight, but now has been caught and is desperate). A few of his crew will back him up and some of the crowd sides with them.
  4. A marathon race has been scheduled to wind through the city as part of a larger season of racing. A number of famous people and some talented locals will participate. During the race, several of the runners suddenly collapse and begin coughing blood. This is the start of a disease outbreak, and will, without precautions, infect over half the city in only 72 hours. The source is magical in nature, and part of a larger scheme to cripple the city by a secret faction.
  5. A bare-knuckle street match has been set up by an enterprising rogue/wizard. A series of ringers are inviting all-comers to challenge for a fat purse. Those who fight are wizard-marked, and followed later, to be kidnapped and bound for a fighting-arena in the Underdark.
  6. An illegal horse race, infamous in the city for causing multiple deaths every year, is about to commence once again. The street the party currently finds themselves in will turn into the aftermath of a battlefield within several seconds. The race has no rules and is heavily wagered upon by the criminal elements of the city.
  7. A “Circus Maximus” involving blood-sport, animal fighting, and a “nautical spectacle” is going to be held at the city’s largest stadium. The public is allowed to sign up to fight in one of the 3 events. The purse for winning is generous (5 figures) and is, of course, rigged and being carefully watched by the strongest Rogues Guild in the city, who stand to make a pile of money. If the party participates, they will see that some of their opponents have been enchanted with speed and strength.
  8. An annual Guards Competition is about to commence. They are divided into 4 teams, and the locals have lifelong and fierce loyalties
  9. In one quarter is an annual event - the Endurance Drinking Contest. A group of competitors take a shot, perform a task, take a shot, perform a different task, repeat. The winner gets a trophy, their portrait on the wall of winners, and bragging rights. The tasks range from silly to nearly impossible.
  10. A mounted race is about to commence, and the party runs into a thick crowd along the edges of the route. If the party chooses to stay to watch, they will see one of the riders being assassinated from a position high above the streets by a mage’s spell.
  11. A traveling ball-team is looking for a manager and some bodyguards, and one of the party’s allies has recommended the party, as a joke. The team shows up where the party is to conduct an interview.
  12. A boxing match has resulted in a death and the angry and bewildered crowd has spilled out into the streets in a terrible brawl, hurting bystanders and destroying property. If the body is examined, 3 small holes in the back of the dead boxer’s neck can be found and 3 small projectiles found inside the wound. The trail leads to a mage’s henchman.
  13. Illegal cart-racing has been taking place at night among the city’s youth and an ally of the party is terribly worried about their child’s possible-participation. The racing will soon claim lives.
  14. The Dozens has arrived in the city - a nationwide, very famous content of insults and put-downs. The entry fee is to survive a round-robin of burns during The Throwdown, where hundreds will enter. The prize is bragging rights, a 4-figure cash prize, and the chance to defend their title next year.
  15. An ally of the party has entered a marathon footrace. During the race, the ally disappears.
  16. A Fishing Derby, the 1st of 3 contests each year, is being held by any who wish to pay the modest entry fee. There is only one rule - you cannot use a traditional rod/reel, fly, or net/seine to catch the fish. The Derby draws the inventive and the mad, and lasts over 3 days.
  17. A professional team of Goliath and Dwarven “Chicken Fighters” arrive at the city for an exhibition match in the city’s swimming pool. One of the Goliath recognizes a party member (whether the members also remembers them, or not) and offers free tickets. During the match, one of the Dwarves is hurt, and after a flurry of rules-consultations, its determined that a substitute is allowed. The party is looked at by the Goliath and asked for help.
  18. A ping-pong match is being staged between Royal cousins, to settle a dispute. The match is going to be public, and during it, both Royals disappear and are replaced with monkeys. Uproar ensues.
  19. The party finds out there is an underground avian-fighting event happening below the tavern. When they go to investigate, they find a goose and a rooster on opposite sides of a metal chess board pushing the pieces around randomly. A ref resets illegal moves and pulls captured pieces from the board. The crowd roars wildly, screaming for their bird to win the game. The party is approached by a grifter who says he knows who’s going to win and will sell the info. The grifter’s prediction will prove right 2 times, then wrong the 3rd time.
  20. An illegal blood-sport fighting match has caused the death of a local celebrity and the party has been framed for the murder.

NAUTICAL (06)

  1. A local ally invites the party on a fishing trip. While on the trip, the vessel is attacked by a desperate band of Kuo-Toa, who appear to be diseased and attack with a more-than-usual savage aggression.
  2. The city is holding a yachting regatta and the party is present when one of the ships catches fire. Many accusations are bandied about and most seem to blame one of the city’s administrators who had a grudge.
  3. A seasonal storm rushes over the city does significant (and costly) damage to the local fleets (and any ships the party might have moored here). Trade and travel is stalled and only a hefty bribe and some forceful diplomacy can secure any movement needs that the party might have.
  4. A local mad-wizard-inventor is launching a submarine and has asked for volunteer pilots and crew. If the party accepts, they are attacked by a great white shark. If they do not, the sub is sunk by the shark. The mad-wizard will try again next month with a new design. If the shark has been killed, this version will find a sunken treasure worth a king’s fortune.
  5. The party is invited to a beach party by an ally. While there, a number of party-goers find themselves suddenly growing gills and webbed feet and toes and a strong urge to enter the ocean. They have been drugged by a Sahuagin Sorcerer, who is trying to build an “amphibious army” to attack the town and destroy it.
  6. A large number of Brachia (Crab-Folk) have surfaced in the bay and are attempting to communicate via the Dream spell (which will manifest as the entire town committing suicide, and this will be dreamed en-masse by the locals). This dream is not a threat, but a warning of what will happen if the townsfolk don’t rid themselves of a recently-acquired magic item (by the party themselves, or by another adventuring group). They have 72 hours to unravel the mystery.
  7. A number of Were-Sharks are attacking swimmers at night (mostly kids/young adults out partying on the beach). These therianthropes are not aware of their actions, but know something is wrong. While shape-changed, they work as a team, like wolves.
  8. While passing a street they encounter a group of semi-drunken sailors. The sailors start a brawl with the party, for their fun. When magic or weapons are used things will get nasty as the sailors will pull shivs, long knives, chains, and cudgels.
  9. Something has turned the ocean red and fish are dying in great numbers.
  10. A large statue that could be worth a lot is trapped in a cavern in the water. If the party can retrieve it without additional help, they can claim it as their own, sell it, and keep all of the profits. If they enlist any help, the local authorities will take over the operation and claim the statue for themselves.
  11. During a sailboat race, a school of merfolk begin harassing and destroying the boats.
  12. A group of traveling sailors try to sell famous and popular books, paintings, and equipment to the party at a great price. Upon closer inspection, the items appear to be forgeries.
  13. A seadragon is heading for the coast, but rumor has it she will slumber if told a bedtime story. In order for her to hear it, the party must intercept her and shout the story from aboard a ship. But it better be a good story.
  14. An ocean water spirit wants to visit a fellow spirit friend who is further inland. They will make a path over land of water they can travel through. The party can try to convince the spirit to follow their path and plot a nondestructive course, or they can try to stop the spirit from visiting their friend through force.
  15. For three days, no one has been able to catch a fish with a hook and line. Nothing even bites, something just cuts the lines before any fish can bite.
  16. Tidal Wave!
  17. A local surfer has gone missing and only his surfboard is found on the beach, covered in a black slime. Days later, his head (missing the eyes) washes ashore.
  18. An Aboleth has awoken in the bay and starts calling minions to serve it. Some of them are townsfolk, and possibly the Mayor as well.
  19. A waterspout threatens the docked ships in the harbor. It is not a natural occurrence.
  20. A pack of Scrag (Sea Trolls) have started plucking beachcombers from the shoreline.
submitted by famoushippopotamus to DnDBehindTheScreen [link] [comments]

As promised: My comprehensive (and biased) list of fun or interesting things to do, eat, and see around Miami and Florida

General things anywhere (tourist friendly):

MIAMI:

South Beach/Miami Beaches/Key Biscayne:

-SoBe (not touristy):



-North Beach:


-Biscayne/Virginia Key:


-Wynwood/Midtown/Downtown:

Food/Bars:



North Miami:



Gables area/Key Biscayne (I’m not too familiar):


South Miami/Homestead:




BROWARD:






PALM BEACH/BOCA:



THE KEYS:


ORLANDO/CENTRAL FLORIDA:



NORTH FLORIDA:

TAMPA/ELSEWHERE:


SCUBA DIVING SPOTS :


submitted by fartsmagoo to Miami [link] [comments]

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GIRLS GOT US KICKED OUT OF CASINO!! (ARGUMENT) - YouTube

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